In a group of 100 children, two to four may exhibit atypical behaviors such as difficulty paying attention, talking excessively, or constantly interrupting others. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is often genetic, with symptoms categorized as inattentive or hyperactive. However, individuals can experience a spectrum of symptoms in various combinations.
To help us understand what it means to grow up with ADHD, we will follow the story of Melinda, a young girl who aspires to be a writer. Her journey illustrates how her atypical brain makes it harder to achieve her dreams.
Melinda’s Early Challenges
In early childhood, Melinda struggles to pay attention. She is easily distracted, daydreams, and often forgets or loses things. Her senses take in too much information, overwhelming her brain. As a result, she often feels frustrated and cries. Her parents, not knowing better, scold her instead of helping her manage her distress.
In elementary school, Melinda cannot sit still and disrupts the class. Although intelligent, she only excels in art while receiving poor grades in other subjects. She is quickly labeled as lazy and not reaching her potential.
Social Struggles and Coping Mechanisms
Melinda also has difficulty making friends, feels different, and is often bullied. The few friends she has tell her she is too emotional but admire her enthusiasm. In fifth grade, Melinda starts doodling to help her focus, but her teacher scolds her, thinking she is distracted. Consequently, Melinda hides her inattentiveness, focusing all her energy on nodding and maintaining eye contact, eventually losing concentration altogether. She turns inward and develops a passion for creative writing.
Teen Years and Increased Struggles
By seventh grade, Melinda’s mind races with thousands of thoughts. She starts wearing headphones to block out the noise and calm herself. However, when she gets her period, she experiences severe mood swings, overeats, and starts smoking.
At 19, Melinda is accepted into a top literature program, but daily responsibilities become overwhelming. She feels burnt out, stops showering, cleaning, and attending classes. One night, she confides in her best friend that she can’t take it anymore. Feeling different her entire life, she feels like a burden to others. Her friend suggests seeing a psychiatrist as a last resort.
Diagnosis and Treatment
The psychiatrist initially suspects depression but, after learning about Melinda’s childhood and family history, orders further tests. A few weeks later, Melinda is diagnosed with ADHD and depression. The psychiatrist explains that ADHD extends beyond the most well-known symptoms. People with ADHD often have deficits in executive functions like working memory, sense of time, and emotion regulation. Some even get sleepy from drinking coffee. However, they are often more creative, caring, and curious than their peers, making them excellent artists or scientists. They may also handle stressful situations calmly, making them fearless firefighters or outstanding surgeons.
The psychiatrist further explains that ADHD symptoms can be managed with medication and therapy, along with regular sleep and exercise. The day after taking her first pill, Melinda bursts into tears. For the first time in her life, her mind is calm. She finds it easy to get up and shower, realizing she had spent her entire life using immense energy to do things that others do without thinking.
Acceptance and Adaptation
While the medication helps, Melinda knows it is not enough. She needs to change her life and find work that suits her strengths. By the age of 30, Melinda learns to accept and appreciate her neurodivergence. Her unique mind is celebrated after the publication of her first novel.
Reflection
What do you think? If you had ADHD, would you adapt your brain to your life by taking pills, going to therapy, and masking your behavior, or would you accept your differences and adopt a lifestyle that fits? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
References
- American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.).
- National Institute of Mental Health. (2017). Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Available at: https://www.nimh.nih.gov
- Barkley, R. A. (2015). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Handbook for Diagnosis and Treatment. The Guilford Press.
- Hallowell, E. M., & Ratey, J. J. (2011). Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder. Anchor Books.